I WILL NOT start over!

A quick share.  This comes from both books: It Starts with Food and The Whole 30.  And it's pretty much why I haven't cheated.

It’s Not Hard

---This program is famous for its tough-love approach. The most quoted line of Whole30 is this: “It is not hard. Don’t you dare tell us this is hard. Quitting heroin is hard. Beating cancer is hard. Drinking your coffee black. Is. Not. Hard. You won’t get any coddling, and you won’t get any sympathy for your 'struggles.'"

So you can about guess how the authors feel about cheating in this program.  Their advice is that if you have a slip or cheat that you need to start over.  That's it.  No breaks, no feeling sorry for us, no sympathy.  Because we have control over all of it!  And I'd be lying if I didn't say that I haven't contemplated eating one of those stupid little Reese's balls (who made Reese's Puff cereal anyway?  "Oh let me just mash up these wonderful chocolate peanut butter candies into little crack balls for kids.) that my kids just have to eat!  I've thought about it!  Who would even know if I ate one?  No one would....that's WHO! 

But actually, I would know.  And I don't want to cheat.  I don't want to lose this challenge.  And I keep telling myself that this is not hard!  I can and will do this! Can you sense my competitiveness?!  It's there!  And I WILL NOT start over.  I WILL NOT!  You know why?  Because I am stronger than food.  

Food DOES NOT own me!  

I've cheated. And lied.

So I promised I would post everyday about my Whole 30 journey and obviously I lied.  Something happened between day 3 and today (Day 10) where I lost myself.  Looking back it's like I was in an alternate universe.  (I'm not crazy....I don't think so anyway!)  So this graphic shows what to expect on the following days of the Whole 30.  I'd say it was pretty spot on for me.  Except that everything happened a day or two later.  

So the good news is that I survived those "great" days.  I didn't kill anything, unless you count that raccoon that I ran over and that thing deserved to die for running out in front of me in the dark and scaring me like that (that must have been on day 5). The hangover wasn't too bad.  I'd been through a sugar hangover before, so I knew what to expect.  And I slept a lot.  I took more naps than usual.  I must have been really tired because one day I napped with my 2 year old and I woke up to her staring at me and a big pile of drool on my pillow.  Out cold obviously.  

From the above paragraph it sounds like it was a cake walk. But let me tell you, it was anything but that!  I avoided people, I avoided food, I pretty much locked myself in my house like a hermit.  I was so afraid to slip up or eat something bad.  And I knew I my willpower was weak during that time, so I just chose to isolate myself and watch a lot of Lifetime (which is actually the perfect day to me!).  But I survived.

And then yesterday, something happened.  Around 9am.  After a huge plate of eggs and bacon.  All of my brain fog cleared.  I felt super alive.  Energized.  Excited.  It was weird.  And cool!  And I still feel like it today.  It's hard to explain, but I just feel good.  I suppose that's part of the experience and the draw of the Whole 30.  This is also the time when a lot of people quit the program I'm told.  Because they feel so good.  And they think they've gained all the benefits.  But I'm told to hang on, the best is yet to come.  So I'll keep hanging on!

People say, I could never do that, I don't know how you're doing that.  That's a lie.  Yes you could.  You can do anything you put your mind to.  I believe this 100%. 

People say, You're crazy, I'd never cut out carbs.  Truth, I'm a little crazy, crazy about my health and well-being enough to cut the carbs for a few weeks to find out what optimal health REALLY feels like.

How have I made it 10 LONG days you ask?  (I know, 10 days is quite the journey!).  Here's how:

• I made a commitment to myself.
• I shared that commitment with my main man (the day after I started, because I didn't want him to talk me out of it...ha!)
• I planned my meals.
• I'm trying different meals and foods. Like this below.  What is it?  I don't know!  It had green stuff and some bacon.  It was fantastic.

• I'm blogging (not everyday like I promised, because I had that week of weird fogginess) and sharing my journey on social media.
• I'm willing to try new things.  Like cutting up a pineapple.  Which I was successful at! 

• I have the support of friends and family.  I can't tell you how many people have shared encouragement and recipes with me.  People have shared their personal experiences with the Whole 30 with me.  They've given me tips and tricks.  I mean, amazing right?!!
• I am not buying crap (as in crap food) for my house. Although my hubs might have brought this demon pictured below into the house......

• I'm packing my lunch everyday for work.
• I'm reminding myself daily, sometime hourly of why I chose to do this.  Food does not control me.  Food should never control me!
• I'm stubborn.
• I hate losing.
• I do not want to be a quitter. I don't quit.  

I won't promise you a blog everyday.  That was a mistake.  I don't know what each day will look like.  Maybe I'll have the energy to type on a keyboard, maybe not!  So don't hold me accountable to that.  But you can hold me accountable to destroying this Whole 30.  And you better believe me when I say that!  

Oh I bet you're wondering about my cheat.  Yep, I cheated. You're not supposed to weigh yourself on the Whole 30.  But I'm a daily weigh in type of girl.  And I did well, until day 7.  And then I stepped on the scale.  Because I wanted to see if this program was "working".  Which is totally off base, because my goal is not to lose weight, but to gain control of my relationship with food.  But if you're wondering, the program is "working".  But no more scale now!  

Peace and love.  And sweet dreams of cupcakes.  But don't eat them!

Nailed It!

Day 1 is done!

The headache from hell set in at about 3 pm. It's my one and only complaint from today. I knew this would happen and I was mentally prepared. My body thinks it needs sugar.

"No you don't body!"

Besides the headache, today was great. I ate lots of veggies, eggs and chicken. Nothing too exciting, but all prepared in a fun new way. So it was good!

I'm excited for the next 29 days!!

Peace out peeps!

Day 1 Initial Thoughts

Quick share here....

--The one thing that makes me very nervous about the next 30 days is that I cannot weigh myself or take measurements. I typically weigh myself every other day, sometimes more. So that will be a HUGE challenge. The purpose of the Whole 30 is not to lose weight but rather to get a better understanding of one's relationship with food.

--Another thing that makes me nervous...the first week, which I anticipate will be semi uncomfortable. You see, I have sugar every single day. And for 30 days I'm saying no to it. I know there will be headaches. I know some tiredness will come. Maybe even some crabbiness. Oh well!

--I am excited to challenge myself.

--I am excited to try out fun new recipes.

--I am excited to push my limits and step out of my comfort zone!

Yep, I'm doing it even though I said I NEVER would.

The Whole 30.

I'm doing it. I swore I would never do it. Ever. So why am I doing it?

Well, I did the Whole Life Challenge earlier in the year and it was by far the worst food/health experience of my life. The Whole 30 is very similar. The Whole Life Challenge was based on many components of the Whole 30. It seems crazy that I'd want to do it again, or at least a program similar to it. But sometimes I make crazy decisions!

I started reading It Starts With Food by Dallas and Melissa Hartwig. And I was hooked. I could not put the book down. It made me take a good hard look at my eating. And it's bad, REAL BAD! In so many ways. Food has a terrible hold on me and I'm done with it. Not with food...haha! I'm done letting food control me.

I'm ready to make a change, a drastic change. For 30 short days. I want to see how good I can feel. I need a reset!

I'm starting tomorrow. Because there is no need to beat around the bush, no excuses anymore, no BS. I'm doing it!

And I'm doing it only for me. Not to compete with anyone. Not to be the best in a group. Not for weight loss. (These things were major contributors into why I failed at the Whole Life Program, even though I finished in the top of the group, lost weight and increased my fitness level, I was miserable and unhappy at the end becasue I did not do any of it for me.) I'm doing this, the Whole 30 so that I can feel my absolute best.

And I'm going to journal every single day. The good, the bad, and the ugly of the Whole 30.

You've been warned.....